9.9.19 ~ Love….Again

I will never give up my search for true love. Currently, I’ve been dating Jimmy since the beginning of May, so we’re 4 months strong. I’ve actually known Jimmy since high school. We had mutual friends but never actually hung out or even spoke to each other more than a few words. He was a wrestler and a football player, and graduated a year ahead of me.

I’ve never in my life had a man treat me as well as he does. He’s the kiss-on-the-forehead, hold my hand kinda guy. He’s incredibly sweet to me. He has his issues though. Life didn’t turn out the way he had planned and he’s got coping issues. Hell, who can honestly say their life went the way it was suppose to? Not me!

So, I’m going to continue this relationship and pray things move forward the way they’re supposed to….

5.18.18 ~ Me, Myself, and I

I’m not really forthcoming with photos of myself. So I figured I’d share one so you know I’m not a robot (no matter how many times I click the buttons to prove it).  I’m 43 now, getting closer and closer to 44. I’m finally embracing my single status and have fallen in love with a wonderful man. We’ll see how that goes, though. I’m still very unsure about men these days. Twice bitten, you know? More on that later.

So here’s me:

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Work, work, work, work, work….

I haven’t written on my blog in almost a month! Holy cow do I work too much! Have I told you what I do for a living yet? Have I mentioned how much I love my job?

Ok, I work with individuals with developmental disabilities. Specifically, I work with men, and its an amazing job. The pay sucks, but the rewards are good for the soul. I highly recommend this field, if you’re job hunting. Mind you, the very idea terrified me when I first applied, but I wasn’t prepared for the reality at all. I love my job. I love going to work. I’m usually 30-45 minutes early! I’m the first one to volunteer for overtime, and I probably work almost 60 hours a week.

(Click the photo below to see the company that I work for…)

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How many of you can honesty say that you absolutely love your job, and love going to work? If you do, please….tell me what YOU do for a living! I’d love to hear about it! 

Coworkers were floating this around Facebook (although, I did not for personal reasons) but the meaning is touching, so I decided to share it here:

I don’t remember the exact moment my life was changed by someone with a developmental disability. The memories seem far away, blurry, as if they don’t belong to me. But this is what happens after you’ve been working with kids or adults with developmental disabilities for years. You change.
They don’t tell you that when you’re filling out your application. Instead, they tell you about the hours, the health benefits, the 401(k) plan, the programs and the strategies. But they don’t tell you about the fact if you do it right, you’ll never be the same.
They don’t tell you it will be the most amazing job you’ve ever had. On other days, it can be the worst. They can’t describe on paper the emotional toll it will take on you. They can’t tell you there may come a time where you find you’re more comfortable surrounded by people with developmental disabilities than you are with the general population. They don’t tell you you’ll come to love them, and there will be days when you feel more at home when you’re at work than when you’re at home, sitting on your couch. But it happens.
They don’t tell you about the negative reactions you may face when you’re out in the community with someone with a developmental disability. That there are people on this earth who still think it’s OK to say the R-word. That people stare. Adults will stare. You will want to say something, anything, to these people to make them see. But at the end of the day, your hands will be tied because some things, as you learn quickly, can’t be explained with something as simple as words. They can only be felt. And most of the time, until someone has had their own experience with someone with a developmental disability, they just won’t understand.
They train you in CPR and first aid, but they can’t tell you what it feels like to have to use it. They don’t tell you what it is like to learn someone is sick and nothing can be done. They can’t explain the way it feels when you work with someone for years and then one day they die.
They can’t explain the bond direct service personnel develop with the people they are supporting. I know what it’s like to have a conversation with someone who has been labeled non-verbal or low-functioning. After working with someone for awhile, you develop a bond so strong they can just give you a look and you know exactly what it means, what they want and what they’re feeling. And most of the time, all it boils down to is they want to be heard, listened to and included. Loved.
When you apply for this job, they do tell you you’ll be working to teach life skills. But what they don’t tell you is while you’re teaching someone, they’ll also be teaching you. They have taught me it’s OK to forgive myself when I have a bad day. There’s always tomorrow and a mess-up here and there doesn’t mean it’s the end of the world. They have taught me to slow down, to ponder, to take the time to just look around and take in this beautiful world and all of the simple joys we are blessed to encounter every day.
So when did I change? I realize now there wasn’t one pivotal moment. Instead, it was a million little moments, each important in their own way, that when added together changed me. And I’m grateful for each one.
A coworker shared this.

September 30, 1971

I want to wish my ex-husband, Rob, a happy 46th birthday. We’ve been divorced for 14 years, but I still consider him one of my best friends. He’s a good dad, a good man, and a good friend and I wish him all the happiness in the world.

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What??!?!

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I just got a notification that I reached 50 likes on here! What??! I was so surprised! You all are just awesome! Who knew people liked hearing about my weirdo family and all our psycho problems! Anyway, thanks so much for supporting my need to file away my memories. Much love to everyone!!

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Meet Ryan

A lot of people will probably think I’m crazy but Ryan is my daughter Cassie‘s boyfriend.

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He’s been living here in my home for a few months now. They’ve been together for almost 2 years, or as I was informed yesterday “one year and nine months.”

13124458_10153462086400925_7632675044963835183_nBefore you ask, I’m not completely stupid. My daughter is most definitely on birth control, not that its anyone’s business but mine and hers. It helps that he is adamantly against teen pregnancy, as well. He’s 19, and she’s 17.

You should understand that Ryan hasn’t had it very easy for the last year or so. After he graduated high school, his mom and her boyfriend moved to a different city, and even after he found his first job he couldn’t afford to live alone on what he was 14708356_10153831218500925_3246325400238626734_nmaking. Due to high drama in my house, I felt safer with having another adult in my house since I work nights a lot, so after I tossed it around in my head for a couple of weeks, I decided to invite him to move in.

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I don’t regret it. I love that kid like a son, and I feel like he respects me like a parent. He is a good kid. He adores my daughter (when they aren’t fighting) and he would bend over backwards for her, even if they were fighting. He always talks to me about their

17884561_10154307588030925_5790893549051226890_narguments, and explains his side of things. He asks my opinion, and actually listens to any advice I might have. I’m not fond of getting in between their arguments, but sometimes I see her side and sometimes I see his.

 

 

 

 

He’s officially a member of my family, regardless of whatever future he might have with Cassie. I’d never turn him away.
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Meet Jason

On a previous post, I’ve showed a couple of photos of Darcie and her boyfriend, Jason. Now, normally I wouldn’t mention boyfriends and such, but since they live together and have been together for over a year now, he’s obviously a keeper. 18835875_769131583247327_5015557915519555538_n

When I met Jason, I heard some wild tales from several people which honestly worried me. Darcie is my oldest, and has never really had a long-term relationship before. Boyfriends, yes….but nothing to write home about. And believe me, meeting Jason didn’t help. Don’t get me wrong. He’s incredibly sweet. He has a great sense of humor. I guess I was just thrown off by the fact that he’s over 13 years older than her, been married twice already, and has a child. I decided I had to look at things logically. He’s got custody of 14720397_651968391630314_1918566557705478502_nhis daughter, whom he worships…and THAT speaks volumes to me. He treats Darcie like a queen (as far as I’ve seen) and THAT speaks encyclopedias to me.

So I can overlook his age, because he’s got a great balance of maturity and playfulness. I can overlook the past marriages, cuz ….well, I’ve been divorced twice too. Why would I look down on anyone for that? Besides, now I get to practice grand-parenting on Tessa.15665526_680989545394865_1675156712436396162_n

But the Star Wars obsession? Hmmm….lol Well, I suppose if he puts up with her Wonder Woman obsession, they balance each other out, right?

 

He’s one of those “good guys” you hear about always getting overlooked or friend-zoned. Its nice to finally see a good guy get the girl.